Self-Care Between Therapy Sessions: What Actually Helps

The most effective self-care between therapy sessions involves practising skills your therapist has introduced (thought records for CBT, grounding exercises for trauma work, mindfulness for DBT), maintaining basic routines (sleep, movement, nutrition), and journaling or reflecting on what came up in session. Self-care that supports therapy is specific and intentional, not generic.

Your therapy session is typically 50 minutes per week. That leaves 10,030 minutes of your week where the real work happens. What you do in those minutes determines how much benefit you get from therapy.

Here's what actually helps, according to research and clinical practice.

The Basics: Non-Negotiable Foundation

These aren't glamorous, but they're the foundation of mental health:

Sleep

Why it matters: Sleep deprivation impairs emotional regulation, cognitive function, and stress tolerance. One night of poor sleep measurably increases anxiety and irritability. Chronic sleep deprivation is both a symptom and a cause of depression.

What to do:

• Aim for 7–9 hours consistently
• Keep a regular sleep schedule (including weekends)
• No screens 30–60 minutes before bed
• Keep your bedroom cool, dark, and quiet
• If you can't sleep, get up and do something calm rather than lying in bed ruminating

If sleep problems persist despite good habits, discuss with your therapist or doctor. Insomnia is treatable. CBT for Insomnia (CBT-I) is the gold-standard treatment.

Movement

Why it matters: Exercise is one of the most evidence-based interventions for depression and anxiety. A single bout of moderate exercise reduces anxiety for 4–6 hours. Regular exercise produces antidepressant effects comparable to medication for mild to moderate depression.

What to do:

• 150 minutes per week of moderate activity (walking, cycling, swimming)
• Or 75 minutes of vigorous activity
• Calgary-specific: Bow River pathway walks, C-train station-to-session walking, weekday trips to the YMCA
• The best exercise is the one you'll actually do, so don't overthink it

Nutrition

Why it matters: The gut-brain connection is well-established. Blood sugar crashes drive anxiety and irritability. Adequate protein supports neurotransmitter production. Omega-3 fatty acids have anti-depressant effects.

What to do:

• Eat regular meals (skipping meals destabilizes mood)
• Limit alcohol (a depressant that disrupts sleep and amplifies anxiety)
• Minimize caffeine if you're anxiety-prone (or at least cut it off by noon)
• Eat enough. Under-eating is as problematic as overeating for mental health

Social Connection

Why it matters: Isolation is both a symptom and an accelerant of depression. Social connection, even brief, low-effort interaction, buffers against stress and promotes emotional regulation.

What to do:

• Maintain one or two key relationships even when you don't feel like it
• Accept invitations even when withdrawal feels easier (set a time limit if needed)
• Brief connection counts. A text to a friend, a conversation with a neighbour, sitting in a coffee shop rather than drinking alone at home
• If social anxiety is a barrier, discuss this with your therapist

Between-Session Therapeutic Activities

Journalling

Not the diary kind. Therapeutic journalling is structured and purposeful:

• Thought records: If you're doing CBT, capture anxious thoughts when they arise. The situation, the thought, the evidence for and against, and a balanced alternative
• Emotional tracking: Notice and label emotions throughout the day. Use a scale (1–10) or simple labels. Bring the data to therapy.
• Gratitude journalling: Writing three specific things you're grateful for each day has research-supported effects on mood and wellbeing
• Therapy reflection: After each session, spend 10 minutes writing what stood out, what felt important, and any questions for next time

Mindfulness Practice

5–10 minutes daily. You don't need a retreat. Brief, daily practice is more effective than occasional long sessions. Options:

• Guided meditation through apps (Calm, Headspace, MindShift)
• Body scan: systematically noticing physical sensations from head to toe
• Breathing exercises: box breathing (4-4-4-4), coherent breathing (5-5), or simply observing natural breath
• Mindful walking: paying attention to each step, the air on your skin, the sounds around you (excellent on Calgary's river pathways)

Homework from Therapy

If your therapist assigns something, do it. This is the single most impactful between-session activity. Common assignments:

• Behavioural experiments (testing anxious predictions)
• Exposure tasks (gradually facing feared situations)
• Communication exercises (trying a new approach with your partner)
• DBT diary cards
• Values-aligned actions (ACT)
• Grounding exercises (trauma therapy)

If you can't do the homework: Don't avoid your next session out of shame. Tell your therapist. The resistance itself is useful clinical information.

What Doesn't Help (Despite Being Marketed as Self-Care)

Avoidance disguised as self-care. "I cancelled plans because I needed a self-care night" is sometimes genuine self-care and sometimes avoidance wearing a self-care costume. Ask yourself: am I choosing this to recharge, or to avoid something uncomfortable? If it's avoidance, talk about it in therapy.

Retail therapy. Temporary dopamine hit, potential financial stress, no lasting benefit.

Excessive social media consumption. Research consistently links heavy social media use to increased anxiety, depression, and comparison. A self-care boundary: no scrolling within an hour of bed.

Toxic positivity. Forcing positive thoughts, ignoring difficult emotions, or surrounding yourself with "good vibes only" content suppresses rather than processes emotions. This works against therapy, which asks you to engage with difficult material.

Over-researching your condition. Some psychoeducation is helpful (you're reading this article, after all). But hours of Googling symptoms, reading diagnosis criteria, and consuming mental health content can become its own anxiety-maintaining behaviour. Ask your therapist for recommended reading rather than falling down internet rabbit holes.

Building Your Personal Self-Care Plan

Work with your therapist to develop a personalized between-session plan. Consider:

1. One non-negotiable daily habit (sleep hygiene, morning walk, brief mindfulness)
2. One therapeutic activity per week (journalling, homework, skill practice)
3. One social connection per week (even small)
4. One genuinely enjoyable activity per week (this is the one that CAN be a bubble bath, because pleasure matters)

The goal isn't perfection. It's building a sustainable rhythm that supports your therapeutic work. Some weeks you'll hit everything; other weeks you won't. Progress isn't linear.

Calgary-Specific Self-Care Resources

• Bow River and Elbow River pathways: free, accessible walking paths throughout the city
• Calgary parks and green spaces (Nose Hill, Fish Creek, Prince's Island) nature exposure has documented mental health benefits
• YMCAs and community recreation centres: affordable fitness options
• Calgary Public Library: free access to books, quiet spaces, and community programs
• Community groups through Meetup, recreation centres, and community associations